“…forgiving isn’t something you do for someone else. It’s something you do for yourself. It’s saying, ‘You’re not important enough to have a stranglehold on me’. It’s saying, ‘You don’t get to trap me in the past. I am worthy of a future’.”
From “The Storyteller“, by Jodi Picoult
Whether it is something we did, or someone else did (or didn’t do), we all have experiences we wish hadn’t happened. Some are able to accept this and move on, but a lot of us still replay these events over and over in our minds as if we could change what has already occurred. Guilt, festering anger, regret, and embarrassment are just some of the emotions that are felt and even internalized. We are great at beating ourselves up over these events. As a result, self-esteem and self-confidence suffer.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean condoning the incident or behavior. It is a way to take back your power over someone or something that you have been allowing to hurt you. By withholding forgiveness, we magnify the energy and block our growth and progress in meaningful ways.
In reality, any experience that we have is simply an experience–not good, bad, right, or wrong–and we are the ones who put a judgment or label on it. If we can begin to see the experience positively and as an opportunity for learning about ourselves (and perhaps making a different choice the next time!), it becomes valuable. We replace the negative feeling with a shift in perspective and a sense of peace.
If you can open to the possibility that you would like to forgive, EFT and hypnotherapy are valuable modalities that can assist you.
Wishing you peace,